I don’t expect you to wake up in the morning-
Doing anything more than closing your eyes and yawning-
I don’t except you to scrabble eggs-
Or shine anyone’s shoes or make all the beds-
I don’t expect you to teach science or math-
Or give child number three a one-hour bath-
I don’t expect you to have patience all day-
I actually don’t expect anything today (or any day).
I don’t except you to cook a 5-course meal-
I don’t expect you to be able to deal-
I don’t expect you to set any limits-
I don’t expect you to start something and finish-
I don’t expect you to have supper by six-
I don’t expect you to only serve a healthy mix-
I don’t expect you to have the kids in bed before eight-
I don’t expect you to feel you have the tools to navigate-
I don’t except you to serve meals on time-
I don’t expect you not to hear your children whine-
I don’t expect you to get any work done-
Not housework or job work or either one-
I don’t expect you to feel extra love and affection-
Even when you’re trying so hard to make the connection-
There’s nothing we expect in this trying time-
So just do your best and take one minute at a time-
If you woke up this morning tried to make it a day-
If you served your kids any food today-
If you said I love you one time this week-
If you had a chance to get some sleep-
If you taught anything to your little ones –
Maybe “to lower expectations and take minutes as they come”-
If you tried to do laundry or just tried your best-
If you got angry for one minute less-
If you had patience for one minute longer-
If you gave yourself courage to try to be stronger-
If you attempted to give yourself love and affection-
If with others you attempted a connection-
If you tied someone’s shoe or poured someone’s cereal-
If you laughed out loud or shed tears that are real-
If you smiled at a soul or smiled in your heart-
If you sat down to do something albeit only start-
If you gave something up or you tried your best-
If you put your negative thoughts to a one-minute rest-
If you cuddled or didn’t or smiled or not-
If you did what you could and gave it all you’ve got-
Then you are a hero- a super dad- a super mom-
Sending you strength, wisdom, and courage, to continue on.
(written in response to discussion with parents who are feeling like nothing is working anymore.)
All the best,
Chana Frumet Yaroslawitz PhD LCSW MSW
